Give Up For Good Again: Songs 2007​-​13

by Jarrod Whittington and the Subatomic Particles

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Self-recorded songs from various bedrooms

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released August 22, 2014

Jarrod Whittington

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Jarrod Whittington and the Subatomic Particles Brooklyn, New York

In summer, the song sings itself.

--WCW

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Track Name: October the Fourth [chamber version]
It seems that I am less and less
Becoming what I might have guessed
And more and more I am becoming not
At all what I might have thought

I was born on the fourth of October
Since then I have not been entirely sober
Being the last one picked and the first one picked apart
Late summer blood inside an early autumn heart

It seems that it was never true
The dream that bonded me to you
Traces of the memory still show
But that was a long time ago

So I will speak to you in a dying tongue
And I will breathe the words through an iron lung
And I will wish you had said what you wanted to say
Instead of dying to leave but surviving to stay

But that was a long time ago
We have changed, I told you so
You told me where I could go
But that was a long time ago
Track Name: Spider And Fly
It's hard to sleep with the moonlight in my eyes
Stalagtite fingers reaching downward from the sky
I shiver, though my blanket clings to me with sweat
I'm holding on for morning, but nowhere near it yet

Afraid to dream again, my head is such a mess
I feel upon my neck the tiny sweet caress
Without a voice to scream I'm helpless in my bed
Long strands of silken fear wrap around my weary head

Oh my god, I've been here before
Wide awake and far from dreaming
Oh my god, I've felt this before
No one sleeps when child is screaming

Hiding under sheets again, I wonder if they know
I think I hear their laughter as eyelids come down slow
That milky sleeps surrounds me, but I don't want to drown
The eastern light reveals me as I'm going down

Oh my god, I've been here before
Wide awake and far from dreaming
Oh my god, I've felt this before
No one sleeps when child is screaming
Track Name: Yr Darkness
I've been waiting
Growing old
I've been burning
From the cold

I've been holding
This tongue
And I've been wondering
If you'll come

Let your darkness shine on me tonight
Let your darkness shine on me tonight
I'm always staring into that deadly light
Let your darkness shine on me

Let your darkness shine on me tonight
Let your darkness shine on me tonight
I'm always bathing in that deadly light
Let your darkness shine on me
Track Name: No Land's Man [Jienan Yuan's Remix]
What is wrong?
Have you been away for so long
That when you got home
All the walls were bricks and mortar?

You know it’s getting harder to cure the soldier
When he knows there’s now a chance to get away from this
Wasted time
Hiding in the rocks inside in the ruins
All your life
Lines cracked in obsidian mirrors

You know it’s getting harder to kill the soldier
If he knows there’s now a chance to get out alive

Here in no man’s land
I am no land’s man
Track Name: Crushed [alternate take]
I'm a dandelion seed, floating on the wind
With you hand outstretched, release a wish within
Feel me crushed, soft against your skin

In your summer dress with the shoulder strap that slips
I'm a piece of ice between your fingertips
Feel me crushed, cool against your lips

On the grass, lying in the yard
I'm a tiny flower, petals spread apart
Feel me crushed, pressed against your heart